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Saturday, November 21, 2015

wandering in italy

hello there dear friends! 
i want to tell you first off that i appreciate that you pop by here and that i love our back and forth on the comments. 
truly a big sincere thank you! 

if you are down for some fun and a fuck ton of sweary shit i post more frequently over on 
come on over say hi, follow the page and chat me up.
i don't do instagram and i hate twitter. 

so anyway a couple weeks ago mr. c out of the blue said that he needed a break from work so we packed a bag and grabbed the italian words we know and peaced out to southern italy for 2 weeks cause we're all gypsy and shit like that. 

i plan to write a bigger post about our trip but for today just a quicky and a couple pics. 

we started out south of rome about an hour from pompeii and made our way around the amalfi coast down to sicily and then back up to positano. 
we only had the first hotel set up and the rest of the trip we just wandered as we felt like it, that's pretty much how we travel.

we hit a snag on the day we were supposed to leave and couldn't get out so we decided to stay in rome. 
that's a whole other story for another day. 

every night when we were by the sea we would make it a point to take pictures of sunsets because hey it's the fucking mediterranean and that's what you do! 

so yea a funny thing happened on this particular evening that i didn't even realize because we were all in our own moment sitting on the beach having cocktails watching the sunset and snapping pictures every so often.
when i went to look at the photo roll of that day i found this little gem! 

so here's a lovely sunset in positano i'd like to share with you.

here's the same lovely sunset a few minutes later. 
ummmmmm what?
let's crop that photo down for a closer look-see....

hahahaha why yes that is a bare assed man!!!! 
his lady is stripping down too!!! 

what came next i don't know because i wasn't trying to capture naked bits they just happened to ass bomb our sunset.

i'll catch up to you soon with some chat and more pics! 

Sunday, October 25, 2015

my neighborhood

i've been doing a photo challenge this fall. 
here's a peek around my nordic neighborhood and some local outings

hope you had a good weekend.

Friday, October 16, 2015

transitioning into my silver/grey/gray hair.

project: grow out natural hair color
status: complete
time line: 1 year 4 months

let's get in the hairy time machine and take a tour. 

the picture below was taken 2012 in tuscany.

despite the conversation i had yet AGAIN for the 10000000 time during a visit to the states with my hairdresser about going natural and my allergy to hair color
i walked out of the salon with deep auburn color and a blistered scalp and $125 less in my purse. again.
because i'm fucking brilliant like that. 

so i rocked up in helsinki with my new color. 
i loved the color. yes, it's true i did.

mr. c. did not. 

i kept the color for 1 year because i had bought 1 yr worth of color until the next time i was going back to the states.

it only looked nice for 2 weeks  because of the new growth. 
not a good color choice for upkeep for me with so much grey and of course the whole dye allergy thing.

so 1 yr later i was in the states again and the hairdresser and i had another go round about going natural
the hairdresser gave me the beat down of how old and bad i would look with grey hair. 

but i did put my foot down and said i cannot have dark hair any more and i needed to start transitioning to my natural color. 

she was not happy, but said... well maybe if you do it over the next 5 years or so. because it's her fucking hair and all i guess.

she promised that i would HATE it if i went natural, because EVERYONE HATES IT when they go natural.

so hours of stripping the dark auburn out of my hair, blisters and too much money later
i came out with strawberry blonde'ish color.
which i hated.
but i knew the dark auburn days were behind me for good and thought lighter would be easier. 

there was a point over the next 10 months of sporting the washed out shitty red/blonde color when i got pissed off at several different things/people/myself/peer pressure and i finally said i've fucking had enough and i will NOT color my hair any more. 
you can read that sweary story here if you like. 

moving on.
in this picture i'm 3 months into this grow out thing. 
see the new growth? 

4 months into this. 
lots of new growth. 
despite my smile i'm hating how i look. 
what else can you do but put on a brave face. 

i cut my hair several times over the grow out year to somewhat get through shitty hair days. 
there was a lot of shitty hair days. 

i never thought about giving up and coloring over my progress but there were days when i wore a hat because i was so sick of looking at my shitty hair. 

cutting it all off into a pixie wasn't for me either. 
pixie grow outs are such a pain in the ass, i've done that a handful
of times and the last time was the last time. 

let's jump ahead to the
1 year 3 month picture.
at this point i had about 3-4'' of the old color left on the ends.

i was going to wait until december which is when i turn 50 and get a big haircut and new style for my new hair and decade of life. 
but this week i picked up my scissors and cut off the old color. 

some times when you're done you're just fucking done. 
i was fucking done. 

so here we are 1 year 4 months. 

my friend K told me the other day... you're done! that didn't take long!
it seems like just yesterday we were talking about you doing this thing and it's been over a year already?! 
time flies! 
haaaa well time is relative to all isn't it! because i felt like it was more like 3 years to me! 

so in conclusion... 
that hairdresser can eat her words because i do love my hair. 
i do. 
i will NEVER and i do mean... 
i will NEVER color my hair again. ever. 

thanks for hanging in there with me and encouraging me along the way! 

Monday, September 28, 2015

caramel apple cake. served up dirty delicious.

i baked my ass off last week and then i ate a bunch of baked goods that went on my ass so i'm walking my ass off this week. 

vicious cycle.

caramel apple cake is just so very autumn.

this cake is super *M-word (opposite of dry) and dense old time cake like.
some may even say it's a blondie.... it's dense cake to me. 
you call it what you like but i'm calling it fucking delicious!

so hey let's talk brown sugar. 
of course i know you bake with brown sugar 
but do you bake with dark brown sugar? no?

all i can get here is DARK DARK brown sugar.  

it's so good. i can't even go back to regular brown sugar. 
can't even.
this brown sugar here is soooo dark, *M-word (opposite of dry) and molassesey ghaaaaaa 

the flavor is so deep it makes everything so much better!
i use it for baking, oatmeal, bbq sauce, marinades. everything.

so if you pass over dark brown sugar because it costs more 
or you've never used it 
or because your recipe doesn't specifically call for it 

do yourself a favor give it a go especially for heavier fall and winter baking.
hell i gotta idea.
make this recipe as an excuse to buy some dark brown sugar.
it's fall. make some damn good cake.

here's the dirtiest song ever written about eating brown sugar. 
and for the kids out there... 
this ain't about brown sugar. 
it's about eating pussy. 

you know what else i love about this recipe? 
no mixer needed. 

caramel apple cake.
prep time 20 min
bake time 40-50 min
9x13 glass pan 

2 c dark brown sugar
240 g or 1 c butter melted
2 eggs
2 tsp vanilla
2 c flour
2 tsp baking powder
1/2 tsp salt
2 *granny smith apples. peeled and chopped
1 c walnuts

make the cake:
bowl #1 
stir together melted butter and that luscious dark brown sugar.

i said yeah, yeah, yeah, woo. how come you... how come you taste so good?
cause it's brown sugar bitch!!!! 

now stir in the eggs and vanilla. 

bowl #2 
combine all the dry ingredients.

stir wet bowl into dry bowl until flour disappears.
stir in apples and nuts.

indeed that shit is fucking thick! 
spread it out in a buttered+lightly floured pan.

time to bake it off.
180c/350f for 40-50 min.
clean tester = done

you must must must let in cool completely before you add the frosting.
it smells so good and i know you want to get all up into that shit but seriously wait.

caramel frosting:
1/2 c dark brown sugar
60g or 1/4 c butter
3 T milk
1 T vanilla (that's right 1 TABLESPOON)
1 c powdered sugar
1/2 c walnuts fine chopped

make the frosting:
grab a whisk and a sauce pan
bring butter, milk and BROWN SUGAR to a boil.
whisk the shit out of it for 2 minutes.

you just made caramel here in case you ever wondered how to do that! 
easy peasy.
fancy now aren't cha! 

remove from heat. 
add vanilla. 
add powdered sugar.
again whisk and whisk that shit until it's good and smooth. 

can you do this with an electric mixer? yes. 
it will be fluffier. i prefer it denser. 
you do what pleasures you it's your frosting.

the frosting is going to be warm, thick and workable you want to work pretty quick and get it on the cake. 
don't fuck around here!
sprinkle on the nuts.
if you have to give them a little tap down to stick in the frosting, you just do that.

now go face deep into that
caramel apple cake


*granny smith apples. 
i recommend them because they are firm, dense and give that offset of slight tartness like a caramel covered apple does. which is kinda the point of this cake. 
BUT if you have a different apple and you have a craving. you go ahead. if using a sweeter apple pull back in the brown sugar by 1/4c in the cake.

*M-word the opposite of dry. 
i do not have an aversion to the word 'moist' but some do.
i do not have an aversion to the word 'pussy' but some do.  
some times i say ''moist pussy'' because it's super dirty. 
that's just my shit right there.

Saturday, September 26, 2015

spicy ricey

spicy ricey with black beans baby.
dedicated to my friend yo.
no, really my friend's name is yo....

this mexican confetti rice is made weekly in our polish-american casa in finland. haaaaa!!!!

we eat it straight up. 

or covered in cheese and a wack of sour cream or greek yogs.

we throw it on nachos. 

or rolled up in a fatty burrito. 

mr c and i eat it vegetarian.  

for the man-boys i'll toss in some chicken or burger.

you can black bean it up or toss in garbonzos or no beans at all. 
i got the wind machine going all the time. don't care.

eat up with a  fork or better yet scoop it up with tortilla chips.

eat it naked on the sofa post coitus.

eat it naked on the sofa post dobbie. 

it's your rice you do your rice your way.

it ain't nobody's business how you like your rice. 

toasted rice

i tried for years to figure out how to make restaurant style mexican rice. 
you know the good rice that's not a sticky starchy ball of shit.

so then enters friend yolanda gonzales. legit senorita!
she goes by 'YO'!

so one day i say... yo, i need help. my mexican rice is a sticky starchy ball of shit.
she leaned in and said... blanca, you gotta rinse the shit out of the rice.

now i gotta tell you, yo can't cook to save her sweet ass but she knows about rinsing rice.
i went on to develop our favorite rice over the years. 
it's got a couple steps but it makes a good bunch to get you through the week. 

smoking hot out of the oven

and then fluffed 

spicy ricey with black beans
baked 190c/375f
20 minutes.
prep time 20 or so minutes.

step 1.
1 c rice
regular, basmati, jasmine.
pictured is jasmine. see it doesn't matter. 
it's your rice use what you have/like.

rinse the shit out of it in a fine strainer. 
i rinse one full minute. 
water should run clear.
let it drain off well. 

in a hot skillet (med high heat) 
IN A DRY PAN let's get toasted. 
if it clumps up just break it up. 
ain't no thing.

again a picture of toasted rice. 
this is what you're going for. 
it may take 5-10 minutes. 
give it an occasional stir. keep an eye on it.
during this time i'm chopping up veg like a mofo.
when properly toasted, reserve rice off in a bowl or whatever.

step 2
1 T olive oil
1 c onions chopped
1 c celery chopped
1 bell pepper color of choice (red is our fav) 
3 garlic cloves good sized minced
1 c frozen corn (fresh is fab if you can get it)
2 c veg broth (i use 1 veg bullion+2c water)
1 c black beans
1/2 c favorite salsa. we like med heat chunky style. 
1 tsp cumin
1/2 tsp smoked paprika 

if i have a chili on hand i'll fine dice and toss it in.
again the heat is up to you. 
you decide on your level of ring sting. 

saute oil+veg.
add broth. 
add beans. 
add salsa.
add spices.
add rice. 

give it a stir up. 
simmer 5 or so minutes. 

transfer to a 8x8 shallow pan or something around that size. 
the rice gives zero fucks if it's glass or metal.
rice don't care.
bake uncovered 20 minutes.

give it a good toss to fluff it up. 
don't worry about the crispy rice on top 
once everything is stirred up it will fluff too. 

now let me tell you, this shit is hotter than fuck. let it set. 
i know it's hard. but seriously let it be for a little bit. 
wait for it.......
okay! smash your face in it! 

makes 12 *burritos or a bunch of buddha bowls or however you decide to eat your rice up.  
*freezes great in burritos too

enjoy. yo!

Sunday, September 20, 2015

do you mayo?

some times i'm all like... 
i could make that shit. 
why am i not making that shit? 

you either do mayo or you do not. 
we do mayo. 
so i say... hey reannon  my gal pal @ she who rambles... talk to me about mayo. so we did. 
*reannon's recipe here

every time i can make something myself it's an ass punch to the man.
take control of your food by knowing what's in it!

it took longer to gather the ingredients than it took to make this.

grab a whisk or a stick (emulsion) blender and lets do this thing.

i used a stick blender. 
this is NOT going to happen in a food processor or a blender so just don't fucking do it and then tell me it didn't turn out. 
cause it wont. 

it's a 3-way mayo

2 fresh egg at room temp. 
(wash your eggs first. your dealing with raw eggs here. do you want the shits? no. i didn't think so.)
(i used 1 whole egg + 1 yolk)
(you can use just 2 yolks. it's your mayo you do it up your way)

1/4 tsp salt (if you like saltier use 1/2 tsp)

1 tsp dijon mustard

1 c sunflower oil (or very mild tasting olive oil or mix of whatever oil you like)

1 tsp apple vinegar

2 tsp lemon juice 

okay now let's beat up some special sauce... that's what mr c said this morning too!

start with eggs (just yolks or combination) salt and mustard in deep bowl.

i used an emulsion blender start with slow pulses. 
reannon uses a power whisk if that's what you have pop over there and follow along from there.
blend until it starts to thicken. 

add a little oil. 
emulsification magic starts to happen. 
as this starts coming together you can start kicking up the speed and stream in the oil.

once all the oil is in add the lemon juice and vinegar. 

blend that shit up until it's good and thick. 

the whole recipe made with the power stick was 3 minutes. 
yes. 3 minutes. that's it. shut up. it's true.

this is beautiful as is 
but wait there's more... 

i heard you yell ....
yea. lets talk about that. 

kid let me tell you about aioli. 
do you know about aioli? no... 
come sit. 

you take a little of that gorgeous mayo and add in some crushed garlic.
sauce up your sandwiches, veg burgers or beaver burger or whatever you enjoy 
whatever you like mayo on, you spread that shit on good and thick!

and then there's this little travel story...

we rocked up at a pub in southern spain for a gin+tonic because it was 800° 
and is there ever a bad time for gin+tonic? 
i think... no.

one of a 1,000 things i love about spain... 
order a drink they bring tapas... it's included. 
it might be a section of olives. 
a little sandwich.
mixed nuts.
it's always a surprise!

on that day, at that pub, at that moment it was 
patatas bravas with spicy aioli sauce.
you know we ordered another round of everything. 
i was rolling my RRRRRR's and dancing the tango by the time we left.
so here you go... 

patatas bravas is fried orgasmic potato wedges served with a side of spicy aioli sauce. 

patatas bravas
scrub up some little spuds. 
little ones are best. not big ass baking potatoes.

boil them up whole. plain water. no salt.  
to the point of a little firm but soft enough to insert fork. 

when done, immerse in cold water. 
let them chill the fuck out. 

when cool, cut in 1/4's let air dry a bit. 
the drier the better.
i must confess i got shit to do and people to feed so they aren't always soooo dry. 

heat up a couple inches of oil in a heavy pan... 
sunflower oil, canola, veg. 
NOT olive oil. 

you're going to get the oil good and HOT
you're deep frying here so we're going to do a quick down and dirty fry up. 
*when oil is good and hot food fries up fast and absorbs very little oil. 
don't be afraid of a good fry up. just don't be eating it all the time. you ain't stupid!

test the oil with a little bit of tater. 
it should bubble like crazy and brown quick. 
your oil is ready! 

in batches, fry up the patatas. 
remove when crispy and brown. 
drain on several layers of paper towel. 
toss on some sea salt.

now back to that sauce... 
the sauce makes it. so make the sauce!

2-3 T mayo 
3 nice cloves of garlic fine minced
whack of your choice of hot sauce... 
striacha, chili paste, etc
you make it as hot as you like it. 
it's your ass so you choose your level of ring sting.


Thursday, September 3, 2015

annnd i'm back.

holy shit it's fall. 
i hope you've all had a good summer or winter for the southern hem peoples.

obvs i was on a blog break. 
it wasn't intentional.
life happens. shit happens. dick pics happen. 

yea some cockwaffle sent me a picture of his junk.
i find great humor in peen... but actual pics of one's cock-n-balls... that's not cool.
i went through a bit of an unplug after that.

also no more anonymous commenting here after a couple vile fucks with too much time on their hands went and ruined that too. 

so moving on... 
the summer holiday meant we had a houseful at times which has meant a fuck ton of cooking. which i

just as the house began to clear out the eldest man-boy moved back in. 
and now the man-boy is enroute to moving to his grown up life... again.
wild drunk celebrating will commence promptly 10 minutes after relaunch... why a 10 minute delay? i should probably shave my legs. 
or something.

mostly my summer was sucked up into a big painting/reno of our livingroom-kitchen.
which segwayed into the long awaited kitchen reno. 
there's been a electrical clusterfuck. because sure why not add an electrical clusterfuck into the mix while cooking for a houseful of people. 

the tile has been chiseled off the wall and a counter ordered. 
a small pile of new fixtures have started to accumulate which looks like a mess but means progress.  

i've been back to walking and yoga. 
i got involved in co-hosting a meditation group. 

working on hosting a book club this fall too. hang in there ladies i didn't forget. promise ;) 

our summer was cold, wet dreary and lasted like 2 weeks if you added up all the days that were +20c (70f) so that sucked balls and now it's fall. 
and fall in helsinki means +12c and rain. like today.

wheeeeew. so that about catches us up. 
hopefully this broke the seal and i can get back to some type of normal blogging... because i missed you... 
but not you, mr dick pic... no. i don't miss you at all. 
you're a strange fuck. 


Wednesday, June 3, 2015

new life for old shit.

if you've been tuning in i've mentioned a couple times that i've been cleaning out my closet.

i decided to pull all the clothes out and get rid of shit.

so i made decisions based on this...

a) clothes that no longer reflected my style today. 

b) worn out shitty looking clothes. 

c) clothes that hold some connection with emotional baggage. 
i got that bad chi out of the house. 

d) colors that don't look good with my new silver hair. 
brown, tan, khaki. soooo boring and just bad.

e) clothes that did not fit TODAY.

no more hanging on to clothes with the thought that if i just lose 10 or 20lbs.
it's fucking masochistic to keep around anything that reinforces negative bullshit!!! 

get that shit out of your closet and out of your life. 
fuck off skinny jeans! 

i only want clothes that i love. 
i only want clothes that feel good on my skin. 
i only want clothes that feel good emotionally. 
i only want clothes that feel like me.

so i've been rebuilding a new intentionally small but happy wardrobe. 

i sorted the clothes for donation or re-purpose. 
i had very little left to put back in the closet i purged hard and heavy handed even bras and shoes didn't escape my rampage.
it was extremely cathartic.

i've given a couple sweaters a new life here (purple) and here (green). 
sewn up a couple new skirts. 
i've been making some fun jewelry too.
i've selectively bought a couple new basic foundation pieces.

a fashion blogger i am not
but this is what i have going on these days....
one of the skirts i made and a cuff bracelet that was made from re-purposed cloth from my old clothes! 

cuff was made from re-purposed linen, wool, leather flower cut from leather winter glove! hardware salvaged from old jacket.
here's a full view of my skirt and yep that's my T & A! hahahaha 

how are you feeling about your closet these days? 
have you ever purged to the point of having almost nothing left? 
do you sew your own clothes? 

enjoy the day! 

Friday, May 29, 2015

random shit friday

random dicks.
are you happy because it's friday or is that a dick bottle opener in your pocket?

another thing for my daughters to fight over when i'm dead! 
michele brought this back for me from greece. 

need your ice cold beer opened? let me pull out my cock opener. 
'cause we keep shit classy 'round here and shit.

random lovelies. 
ghaaaaa i got smelly mail!!!!! 
the lovely clare at girl fifteen is making the most gorgeous handmade natural products! 
she's blending fantastic scents!

thank you so much clare!!!! you really spoiled me!!! just fantastic all of it... the quality, the scent combination, the packaging!  
let me know when you're ready to market because the holidays will be here before we know it. 

random sewing.
i've been working on more sweaters. 
this is the back side of one of the coldwater creek sweaters that shrank up in my closet.

random sweary shit.
do you want to come round for tea?
my cup is here! 
btw this was my 11th month of no color/dye picture. 

randomly growing shit.
other things that take a long time to grow.... 
i'm growing a lemon tree.
you know that 'how to grow a lemon tree from seed' pin that's been floating around on the pinsy forever.... well i did it last summer. i had 2 make it. this is mr lemon head. 
i hope someday it can be bothered to make lemons for my tea or a gin&tonic.

random listening.
a little matthew fowler. 

if you're into spotify like i am you can pleasure yourself on more of his music here.

random cooking.
i did a little entertaining this week and whipped up some of my fuck-you-jet-lag-brownies for the travelers. 
safe travels ladies back to the motherland! 

okay that's it have a good friday!